the day we met donald trump

so i have this really big project i gotta do, a lot is riding on it. but you know what, to me, it feels like story time. so here’s a story about the day we met donald trump.

this goes back a few years. we had received a call from “his people”. they had met with walmart, pitching the idea of a line of the donald’s cars in die-cast; at that time, wm was saying yes to everything (ah, the good old days of die-cast), and suggested they contact maisto. i got the call. and the call after that. and the one after that. you’d of thought i owned the last piece of real estate available in nyc. at any rate, we get together, and they say we want to do some die-cast cars, what do you have? i say we have this great line of limousines, why don’t we add a chip so when the door opens you get donald saying something OTHER than “Your Fired” (which we could not use for legal reasons.) they like it  – we sign the deal, and then the realization hits – we have to record him saying stuff.

about 3 weeks of negotiations ensue on the script – “he won’t say that…” is mostly the answer we get. r2b2 suggests he records “this is a pimp ride yo!” his people don’t agree.

finally, we decide on about 10 phrases, and because r2b2 is in a rock band, we figure he can handle the recording and electrical stuff. so we pack our bags and head to ny to meet and record donald trump.

so we get to the building on 5th ave, you know, the gold one, and we meet with our contact.

first thing we notice – she is more nervous than we are. we go up to her office, and await “the call”. it comes, and we are escorted to “his” office floor, and put into a conference room to wait. we get set up in about 5 minutes, do a couple of takes, and wait for donald. and wait. we are just chilling, and we can hear his booming voice down the hall speaking to someone on the phone. we wait some more, and then he bursts into the room. our contact had told us he had this germ thing going on, he won’t shake hands. so of course, as soon as he walks in, he extends his hand, r2b2 and i trip over ourselves to shake his hand, and our contact screws up the intro. don’s smart though, and asks ME if i own the company. i’m dumb though, i say no, and don is like what am i dealing with here – some UNDERLINGS?

so he gets the script, reads it as he’s talking to us “we’ll do a test, I’ll read 1, see if it records, and then i’ll read all of them twice. got it. ready?” r2b2 is fumbling with the controls, trying to track his voice, says ready, and don reads the first one. booms it. home run. his voice is so far in the red i think it broke the machine. so r2b2 has to fiddle around, trying to re-calibrate the machine, don has been in all of about 45 seconds (no exaggeration) after we waited about 45 minutes (also no exaggeration) and, and he lets out a “you want me to come back in 5 minutes?” i look at r2b2, he doesn’t look up, don asks again, “you want me to come back in 5 minutes?” – and i’m thinkin’ we’re in some trouble here. r2b2 is the coolest guy in the room, gets the machine where it has to be, don rips the 2 takes of each, he says good-bye, and we’re done. 4 months later, the product’s in wm,

4 months after that they are marking it down, and there you go. all in all, it was pretty cool, one of the coolest days i have had working here.

that is until the day we met dj lady tribe… but that is for another story time…


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